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  1. Prikvačeni tweet

    I'm pretty sure the ass is my spirit animal.

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  3. My one knee is killing me. Squats are not my friend.

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  4. This is spooning weather. And maybe a little forking in there too

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  5. If this is true then I’ve already met that quota a long ass time ago.

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  6. Nighters! So happy I can be a voice of reason in the Twitterverse. You’re welcome 😏

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  7. My new boyfriend’s name is Ray O’Vac... the news of my recent change in relationship status is all the buzz

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  8. Steve Kornacki fucking cracks me up! When he’s doing it, are there graphs and charts to provide a play-by-play?

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  9. I wish I could read the Economist for free! Outrage!

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  10. The crest toothpaste with charcoal is tops with me! 😃

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  11. Ay si papi... dale loca

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  13. Yo, I’m about to keep it tighter than the babysitter. Let’s get it 💪🏼💃🏻🇵🇷

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  14. There’s a lot of people on Tinder who are already in relationships, i.e. married who want people to “join in.” There’s also a lot of dominants looking for their subs. For fucks sake, when did dating get so weird?

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  15. Just put a ton of hot sauce in my soup! Woo hoo!! 🔥🔥🔥

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  16. Here’s to disappearing waistlines, not disappearing civil liberties! ❤️⚖️

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  17. Down 6.9 lbs since December. Slow and steady I guess, but the mini goal is to drop another 8 lbs by the end of the month. Not sure what kicked my ass into gear, but I’m gonna do it! 💪🏼💃🏻

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  18. Yea, that’s why I have to go to the gym 😒

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  19. Happy Wednesday! Go out there and change some lives, even if it’s with just your smile.

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  20. I’m going to fall asleep watching Greys Anatomy because Dr. McDreamy is totes adorbs. 😍

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