cнrιѕ elѕтon  

@christophelston

нυѕвand | dad | cғp | vancoυverιтe | advocaтe ғor ѕeмιcolonѕ | eхpoѕιng ѕcιenтology ➡️

Vancouver, British Columbia
Joined September 2010

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  1. Where’s Mueller?

    Undo
  2. Can’t we just build a moat filled with gators along the southern border? Immigrants can play Frogger to get across. If they succeed, they get citizenship for being awesome.

    Undo
  3. Jan 3

    John Legend is the only prolific R. Kelly collaborator to come forward & put him on blast. Badu declined. Jay-Z declined. Questlove declined. Lil Kim declined. Chappelle declined. Mary J. Blige declined. Your activism doesn’t mean shit if it’s only for show & ignores black women.

    Show this thread
    Undo
  4. Jan 3

    Is China paying tariffs to the US? NO! When a US company imports a dishwasher from China, the US company pays that tariff. Then the US company passes on much of that tax to you, the US CONSUMER, through higher prices. You are paying the tariffs.

    Undo
  5. Jan 3

    In a brilliant power move, Sidney Crosby gave a Rangers fan who chirped him all during the Penguins’ 7-2 blowout win last night an autographed stick.

    Show this thread
    Undo
  6. Jan 2
    Undo
  7. Jan 1

    A quarter of São Paulo residents say they have been held up at gunpoint. “We’ve become hostages in our own country.” via

    Undo
  8. Jan 1

    Presenting the ellipsis: ... THREE DOTS Not four. Not five. Not a substitute for a period, a comma, a colon, or punctuation’s peculiar participant: the semicolon. Use them to show part of a quote is missing, or to indicate a pause. “And the 2020 winner is ... Beto O’Rourke!”

    Undo
  9. Jan 1

    What’s your New Year’s resolution? Mine is to become the White House Chief of Staff and fire everyone. Or maybe I’ll go for Treasury Secretary, and order an investigation into Scientology’s tax-exemption. , that’s a good reso for you. More money for slats.

    Undo
  10. Jan 1

    Scientology’s miniature Mussolini, Mr. Miscavige, loves to defraud his customers and spend hundreds of millions on gaudy, ridiculous buildings that sit empty. Leah Remini talks about it tonight on A&E. For more craziness, join our evil FB group:

    Undo
  11. Earth to Trump. Drugs don’t get walked into the country. They come in Los Pollos Hermanos trucks.

    Undo
  12. I had the good fortune to dine with about 30 elderly Canadians in their care home tonight. Every single one despise Trump. The Hitler references were abundant. Canadian 🇨🇦 approval rating: 0%

    Undo
  13. I have less than two days to find a live baby unicorn that stays a baby forever. Please PM if you have any leads.

    Undo
  14. Would you kindly share your Christmas brunch ideas with me, please? I think it’s my favourite meal of the year.

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  15. The great grammar divide: the Oxford comma. In school you were taught that the Oxford comma is an optional comma before the word ‘and’ at the end of a list. E.g. “I ate carrots, beets, and cucumbers.” vs. “I ate carrots, beets and cucumbers.” I vote for Oxford.

    Undo
  16. Can’t someone do a 72-hour psychiatric hold on this guy in the Whitehouse?

    Undo
  17. This is the stupidest thing I have ever seen, and I was a Scientologist. It’s blank.

    Undo
  18. I count 37 new bills. Wow, I thought Congress wasn’t doing anything except arguing about a wall. Who knew they wrote 37 new bills? Oh, this is just some of the many bills! Wait, that paper is blank. It’s actually blank. Screw impeachment. Do the nuclear option on him.

    Undo
  19. “Therefore, I commit myself to the Sea Organization for the next billion years.” This is what super dedicated Scientologists sign. The leader’s locked up wife only has to stay locked up for the next 999,999,954 years.

    Undo
  20. Mike Lindell, the founder and CEO of My Pillow, has invested $1 million in the production of the pro-life film “Unplanned.” Lindell has a small role in the film where he bulldozes a Planned Parenthood abortion clinic.

    Undo

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