Conversations become ineffective and inflammatory when another’s differing strategy gets misconstrued as a difference in values, at which point it’s easier to demonize the other (eg if you aren’t pro-life you must be anti-life; if you aren’t pro-choice you must be anti-choice)
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Hmm yes good to color and charge things people say as of good will (goodwill a value?) I think even having judgement could be fine in convos, I don’t even think wanting to understand other person is necessary, rather trusting that there is a shared baseline value
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especially w people you don’t know well, it’s difficult and probably inaccurate to assume there are shared baseline values in disagreements, i often feel like i learn more about my opponent’s position from *the way they interpret my challenges* than from their actual argument
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