“Do you put yourself in to any special sort of receptive mood to pick up on another's vibe or is it a more general sort of thing?” I think it’s related to empathy and how generally sensitive you are to others’ emotional states and minor actions. /4
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Like you’ll be more likely to get a “vibe” off someone if you’re 1) naturally pretty empathetic or 2) you’ve lived through a situation where being keyed into someone’s emotional state was necessary for you over an extended period of time (abuse, sensitive partners, etc) /5
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This is probably pretty intuitive so far for most people but what’s particularly interesting about it is when people are able to trigger unexpected emotions in you based on their energy (which I’m going to use as shorthand for those collective mannerisms etc). /6
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It also seems like it has something to do with your interpersonal power relative to the other person—if they have something you want, or have higher or lower status than you, idk, this seems to play in somehow to your perception of their vibe. /7
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We observed how one person comes off as very “cold and alien” feeling and described another person as “buzzy and a little bit dangerous.” I can also think of people I’d describe as “soft and inviting” or “warm and happy”—again this refers to _how they make you feel_. /8
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I usually think of myself as pretty tough, at least on the exterior (I’m actually really fragile a lot of the time but tend not to show it externally), and do it surprises me when people provoke strong enough emotion in me to make me, for example, want to cry in a meeting /9
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The person who is “buzzy and a little bit dangerous” is one of like two people I’ve met who can do that without yelling or saying something directly cutting—there’s something about him that makes me feel deeply like I need to please him (and I barely know him) /10
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I think it’s fascinating that we can ascribe tactile sensations to emotional states triggered by a package of mannerisms, relational power, and visual aesthetics (including style of dress) /11
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What causes that? It seems to be somewhere in the fear/attraction space, like an intrinsic gut level push/pull triggered by your expected expectations about your future interactions with that person maybe? /12
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I was wondering a little how much of it is just developed throughout your life or whether you can work to develop a different aesthetic? I’ve known people with “creepy” vibes who know it, desperately want to change it, and despite their best effort can’t seem to shake it /13
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chad donkey from shrek 2 Retweeted chad donkey from shrek 2
I’m fairly confident you can change your ‘energy’ However, it can be a very slow process and harder for some people than others, depending on where you start—maybe a little bit like getting in shape? https://twitter.com/choosy_mom/status/1218978348069638146?s=21 …https://twitter.com/choosy_mom/status/1218978348069638146 …
chad donkey from shrek 2 added,
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