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choosy_mom's profile
chad donkey from shrek 2
chad donkey from shrek 2
chad donkey from shrek 2
@choosy_mom

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chad donkey from shrek 2

@choosy_mom

poast structuralist, meesa rationalist, emotional hypercapitalist, ardent anti-insight crusader ⚔️

sf
Joined December 2017

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    1. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      feels like i'm close to finding the simplest and most impactful slogan or phrase for talking about emotional projections / emotional flashbacks / being blinded by ghosts from the past / @Malcolm_Ocean's nightmare mashups; aaalmost but not quite there yet (1/n)

      6 replies 4 retweets 58 likes
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    2. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      people really do not understand 1) how much they're being blinded by ghosts from the past 2) how much it is possible to *lay the ghosts to rest* and i suspect the best way to convey this is through fiction (2/n)

      2 replies 3 retweets 59 likes
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    3. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      when you combine the "im baby" and "mommy gf" memes you get a distressingly accurate picture of what is going on when many men interact with women: they are attaching to them as possible sources of the care and warmth and intimacy they never received as children (3/n)

      1 reply 10 retweets 60 likes
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    4. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      this dynamic isn't gender-specific but we've already had "daddy issues" as a meme for awhile. surprised i haven't seen "mommy issues" have the same cultural penetration, maybe that's the direction to push (4/n)

      3 replies 1 retweet 31 likes
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    5. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      there are a lot of people out there who just am baby, and somehow they're expected to navigate the workplace and sex and so forth, all while projecting their parents, teachers, exes, etc. onto whoever fits (5/n)

      2 replies 3 retweets 37 likes
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    6. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      (i am, as always, speaking from personal experience here) "adulting" is hard when you are in a very real emotional sense *not an adult*. if we really want to get to the bottom of "mental health" at some point we're gonna have to confront this (6/n)

      1 reply 13 retweets 75 likes
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    7. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      this idea needs supplementary memes too, like: there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a child, physically or emotionally. children are fully people. admitting that you're emotionally a child does not imply anyone gets to take away your autonomy (7/n)

      2 replies 7 retweets 54 likes
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    8. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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      but personally i find "i am emotionally a child" a more parsimonious, more emotionally meaningful, and just plain more accurate description of my issues than "i have anxiety, depression, ADHD, RSD"; those are symptoms of *stunted emotional development* (8/n)

      7 replies 6 retweets 79 likes
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      chad donkey from shrek 2‏ @choosy_mom Jan 6
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      Replying to @QiaochuYuan

      wrt emotional development, is there a final evolutionary form you can aim for? how much work does this take, and how do you know if you’ve achieved it? alternatively, what are the discrete competencies associated with someone who is “emotionally an adult”?

      12:05 PM - 6 Jan 2020
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        2. chad donkey from shrek 2‏ @choosy_mom Jan 6
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          Replying to @choosy_mom @QiaochuYuan

          a few obvious things come to mind (crying, emotional self-awareness, developing productive non-avoidant coping mechanisms) but I think there’s some more subtle stuff here, which is hard for me to articulate—esp as someone who’s still striving towards emotional adolescence

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
        3. QC‏ @QiaochuYuan Jan 6
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          Replying to @choosy_mom

          there's like "good enough to get by" - reasonably stable interactions at work and in your intimate relationships - and then i think it's possible to get much, much better, aiming towards asymptotically something like "accurate emotional reactions"

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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