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I was taking care of a patient the other day who was very seriously injured. And I stepped out to talk to his family briefly and give them an update. For context, he was Black. I told them what was going on quickly and asked if they had any questions. And this is what they said.
They told me that he worked for [well known company] And that he was a [respected role] at that company That he was on his way to work That he is loved in the community A good brother and son That he was well dressed before the blood soaked his clothes
Nothing in recent memory has broken my heart as much as gradually realizing that a family of a shattered man whose chief concerns should have been - when can i see him, when does he get out of surgery, do you know his meds and allergies, his mama gets to go in first...
...had to worry that the racism inherent in the system and in people everywhere meant they had to spend their few moments with me putting him in a favorable light, shifting any possible implicit negative frame I had (e.g., "hoodlum" or "criminal") to get him the care he deserved.
What is the goal of all our anti-racist pledges over the past summer? It's that this family can walk in with full confidence that their loved one is valued and cherished here and that we will fight for his life with everything we have, no questions asked.
I had one minute to the next trauma. I babbled stuff incoherently and am pretty sure I got it wrong. The words of one random disheveled Asian doctor don't change much against a lifetime of experience to the contrary. But I will carry this with me. We have so much work to do.
They felt that they needed to make you feel and believe that he was valued? I'm sorry they had such uncaring or hostile treatment elsewhere that this was their ingrained response.
They live in America. This is a constant for us whether we are at the hospital, bank, school, department store. The shit never ends.
This is what systemic racism looks like.
It’s a sad reality for us and a harsh reality for African Americans. Hope your patient is stable and doing better. Thank you for sharing this.
Yes, a heart wrenching story to hear but very real and needed. Thank you for sharing. So much work to be done 
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