If only the concern expressed about that was proportionate to the incidence rather than deflection from more typical patterns of abuse.
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what level of statistical prevalence is necessary before somebody's life experience becomes valid for them to talk about?
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None. But again, many people talking about this issue aren't doing so out of personal experience.
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Replying to @sschinke @chaosprime and
If the people talking about it were the people experiencing it, then it *would* be proportional.
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okay, but i don't see how it's relevant; clearly
@HatredIsMyMuse isn't talking about something he read in an email forward from his anti-women's-suffrage great-uncle2 replies 0 retweets 0 likes -
Replying to @chaosprime @sschinke and
bringing it up here is tantamount to an assertion that the people who do have the life experience need to shut up in order to compensate for the people who are talking about it without the life experience
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No, it really isn't. "But women can be abusive too" is a really common deflection tactic when a man is accused of abuse.
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Replying to @sschinke @chaosprime and
And in that situation, it's a deflection even if the person doing so has experienced abuse from a woman.
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yes so we're certainly doing a lot here to dispel the idea that one literally cannot say that the behavior called out in TZP was abusive without being buried under a pile of reflexive ideological pushback
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i think that if TZP is more or less truthful, some of the behavior called out in it is abusive behavior by Quinn, and much of it is perfectly reasonable behavior that Gjoni is angry about because he's a controlling abusive shithead. Where does that fall on your spectrum?
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i consider that a 100% reasonable reading and i have no objection to it
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I also often think that 20-somethings should just never get into relationships because they tend to be really shitty and abusive to each other. But that's how it happens, you know?
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