lots of inner silence I really dodged a lot of cultural bullets i think
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I had a lot more *inner* silence as a kid but I talked aloud...*constantly,* and my dad sat me down one day and explained that some people have an *internal* monologue and would I please consider developing one
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hahaha fuck
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it's delightful how often I review childhood memories and realize that my parents were just owning me the whole time
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the ones that kill me are the ones where my dad was trying to be ego syntonic but i didn't understand him so i thought he was making fun of me my heart just breaks for everyone involved
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Replying to @BonbonFork @selentelechia and
oh, it's mostly just that he'd call me Confucius, which y'know did have an element of mockery in it but it's like 15% don't-get-too-big-for-your-britches type gentle poking fun and 85% proud of my big brain boy, but i was like 5 and didn't know who the fuck Confucius was
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Replying to @chaosprime @BonbonFork and
so it just sounded like the word "confused" to me, so i thought it was just an insult, but he didn't seem to be using it quite that way which did in fact make me confused so now the insult is accurate
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Replying to @chaosprime @selentelechia and
Do you think that if he told you who Confucius was, opened an encyclopedia, showed you a picture, told a story in simple terms - would it work better for you? Asking with the intention of not being a difficult dad myself (not saying yours was difficult, how can I know)
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Replying to @BonbonFork @selentelechia and
oh, mine was awful, dgmw, part of the reason i didn't get it is that it didn't make sense to me for something he was saying to not be emotionally abusive just seems tragic for that to have ruined it even when he was trying to be nice education would've helped actually i think
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i was super into like Bullfinch's Mythology and whatnot around this time so i probably would have gotten way into any kind of Chinese-literature-for-Western-kids material i could have gotten my hands on if that had happened
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Replying to @chaosprime @BonbonFork and
also TIL i'm from the Bullfinch Continuum
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