being the kind of hypersystematizing nerd who feels that OOP classes that exist only to contain static utility methods are somehow offensive is relatable, if ridiculous, but once you're doing something = (new someClass())->someUtilityMethod(whatever); you need to be put down
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any sufficiently advanced argument list is indistinguishable from a data structure
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Any argument list distinguishable from a data structure is insufficiently advanced
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