unfortunate thing about crucial social affordances whose cost-benefit structures can't be articulated because articulating them would wreck their benefits is that when someone wants to tear them down because they've decided it's what's making them sad, you don't have a lot to say
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trying to generalize from that; I have a concern that if someone is carrying around a belief that fragile, having to shield it from information will close off opportunities in many seemingly-unrelated areas
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