sleepily looking for a butter knife to cut up a banana for cereal, i thought “didn’t i... earlier?” where the fully subvocalized thought would’ve been “didn’t i [leave a knife there] earlier [days ago]?” and i could dimly perceive the actual cognition underlying the verbalization
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the emergence of a clear internal monologue corresponded with a depressive episode for me, so YMMV haha
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best thing about this is remembering what it felt like before - no complete sentences, just sensations and fragments of mentalese, literally feeling like speaking was either a) conjuring words from literally nowhere or b) trying to do a pencil rubbing of a cloud
End of conversation
New conversation -
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