if i were a superhero, instead of stopping muggers i’d commit aggravated assault on people who make systems work worse for no better reason than being narcissistic scumbags
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like somebody’d start crossing the street at the very end of their signal and proceed in front of traffic at a blithe stroll, and i’d fly down and flick them with my finger, sending them crashing into the nearest building at bone-pulverizing speed, then fly away with a big smile
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Replying to @chaosprime
this is the most New York thing you've ever posted
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Replying to @systemergent @jenphalian
taboo against disclosing an impulse to violence in response much much stronger though innit
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Replying to @chaosprime @jenphalian
Made more challenging by the priggishness of those crossing
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"it says right here in the city ordinances"
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Replying to @systemergent @chaosprime
*twisting awkwardly to point at the subsection of city references tattooed on a firm cyclist calf*
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Replying to @jenphalian @chaosprime
Also " I am old and wise as can be told from my measured pace with hands clasped behind my back, do not presume to disturb my reverie"
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Replying to @systemergent @chaosprime
eugh we get those in the Minneapolis skyway system, and it's a misdemeanor to push them over the railings or down escalators
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felony if you do it right
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