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  1. Retweeted
    Jun 2

    'Damn those lefties and their so-called science. What are they REALLY up to, that's the question. Bet you $10 it's something gay.'

  2. Jun 2

    No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no

  3. Retweeted
    Jun 1
  4. May 26

    A Trader Joe's cashier just hit on me then got pissed when I didn't engage. Dude, it's Friday. Give me my peanut butter and let's move on.

  5. Retweeted
    May 25

    You tiny, tiny, tiny little man.

  6. Retweeted
    May 21

    wonder if is gonna ask Ivanka to return the money or?

  7. Retweeted
    May 20

    steve bannon looks so uncomfortable here and it rules

  8. May 16
  9. Retweeted
    May 15

    This is the best thread on Twitter. Take a bow.

  10. Retweeted
    May 13
    Replying to

    (He deleted it but it was great the 1 minute it was up)

  11. May 12

    sure Cynthia was a really cool dancer but that weave was busted af

  12. Retweeted
    May 10

    ME IN 2016: I have principled objections to Hillary Clinton ME IN 2017: I guess it's OK if The Rock was president

  13. Retweeted
    May 11

    Fox News alerts, like if 1950s could text you

  14. May 6

    "Once you call New York home, anything else will be second best."

  15. May 5

    6 Things You Need To Stop Asking Colorblind People via

  16. Retweeted
    May 4

    NBC reporter just asked a bunch of Republican Congressmen if they've READ the health care bill. Hilarity ensues.

  17. Retweeted
    May 4
    This media may contain sensitive material. Learn more
  18. Retweeted
    9 Jan 2014

    It’s Thursday. How many people have lost their healthcare today?

  19. May 2

    What's your favorite springtime accessory?

  20. Apr 25

    i accidentally DMed Bette Midler on Instagram, in case anyone was wondering how things are going.

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