Last month I remarked abt how sad it was that incel culture had taken root like it had, because the truth is that people of all genders struggle w/loneliness, figuring out how to connect, how to find the relationships we need in order to really live. 1/14https://twitter.com/carolynmichelle/status/1121181779405066240 …
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And yes, physical appearance does matter. It does effect how we're perceived and treated. Sometimes it does effect the opportunities that are available to us, in our personal lives, in our professional lives. It's silly to pretend otherwise.
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And so some part of me wants to reach out to these men with some measure of empathy, to say "Look, I'm sorry you're hurting. I'm hurting too. Lots of people, cis and trans, women, men and nonbinary folks, are hurting...
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...Let's look at the cultural issues that are actually at work here, what they say to you as men, what they say to us as women, let's have a conversation about this that comes from a place of empathy, that understands that being alone, that not finding love is hard."
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But so much damage has already been done. The way these men feel that they are owed something specific by specific other people, the cold, transactional view of it all, the way the whole incel worldview dehumanizes women rather than recoginizing THEIR desires and inner lives.
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I don't even know where I'm going with all of this. I just get so frustrated. I feel like a humanizing empathy is essential here, but also like the soil has been scorched and I don't know how to plant the seeds and cultivate a more human conversation in these men's lives. /FIN
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End of conversation
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