getoffmylawn

@calyx1970

Trouble maker...don't make me start dancing! Married to the GOAT

Vrijeme pridruživanja: siječanj 2011.

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    PAPER FUCKING BALLOTS.

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    Husband just said “casually” to me: “maybe you could google JLo’s workout and just do that?” as he shoves, and I am not making this up, the kids’ uncrustables sandwich into his mouth. I would like to preemptively report a murder.

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    It's a Super Bowl victory, not the purge.

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    Jennifer Lopez is 50 and Shakira is 43 and in totally unrelated news I’m going to the gym in the morning

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    Winner! Doritos Cool Ranch wins the Super Bowl

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    for the win

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    One of the best halftime shows I’ve seen. A beautiful nod to the culture of Miami

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    why pitbull isn't the one performing the national anthem, the halftime show, and doing the play-by-play i'll never understand

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    My wife came and picked me up at the dive bar because I can’t drink all day anymore after Dry January, shout out to for another big donation, we are at $2,744.96 for the kids and I am at the Tee Pee bar trying to order a block of cheese and green chile

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  13. 1. velj

    Where is

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    Tweet je nedostupan.
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    best part of the Phoenix Open is watching women in 6" stiletto heels slowly sink into the grass, like some sort of stripper quicksand

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  16. 31. sij
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    Control your emotions doesn’t mean avoid your emotions. Feel that shit, understand that shit, just don’t lose your shit.

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    Hug your kids today...Life is short...❤

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    26. sij

    Michael Jordan releases a statement on Kobe 🖤

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    LA County Sheriff rightly slams TMZ for breaking the Kobe news before his family could be informed. They are a despicable organization.

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