But if you tell them you like to run, and then you chat for a bit, and then later you tell them you like to write collage poems, they think you're cool. And when you do a lot and slowly reveal it, that makes you interesting to them. So you just have to slow down a lot
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Anyways this is one of those unwritten rules of neurotypical conversation I legitimately never picked up on until recently. Whereas with neurodivergent folks it's normal to just drop all of your hobbies at once because if one overlaps THAT'S GREAT INSTANT FRIENDS
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(I still don't really understand the mechanism for neurotypical folks getting overwhelmed by you telling them all of your hobbies at once, I just know it happens and I should avoid it---if anyone can explain why I'd be grateful)
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Neurotypical aside, who tells anyone all their hobbies at once? What kind of conversational gambit is that?
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Most neurodivergent people I know do this, there's just no use wasting time, we want to share all of the cool things we like in hopes of quickly finding common conversational ground
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I guess I would bin this into the general category of "you overwhelming people with words." And yeah, it sucks this is a temptation of neurodivergent people (I struggle(d?) with this a bit) but bulldozing over people in conversation will definitely alienate basically everyone.
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Almost all neurotypical folks
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Yeah, I'm working on this with my psychologist at the moment… being able to moderate myself is a good skill, but it gets exhausting over time, and I need places where I can just be myself. And I shouldn't feel the need to beat myself up over years whenever I ‘screw up’. 😅
