first-mate prance

@bocxtop

21. nervous. vote for Bernie. he/him

Pittsburgh, PA
Vrijeme pridruživanja: listopad 2014.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    7. stu 2019.

    bro we only live once ok just message her, carpe dm

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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    reporting live from our precinct: it’s packed for Bernie here!! we’re already the biggest crowd & supporters are filling rows of the overflow balcony in this auditorium

    , , i još njih 2
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  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 25 minuta

    Bernie vs Biden corners at the Zem Zem Islamic Center in Des Moines. Lots of white bros as you can see.

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  4. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    28. sij

    sorry babe, the crippling physical insecurity stays ON during sex...please turn the lights off :(

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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    3. lis 2019.

    Girl’s ig story: Happy me: oh fuck what’s coming next Girls ig story: Birthday me: Holy shit lmao girls ig story: To me: to who to who c’mon tell me girls ig story: My me: I’m dying here! spill it alrea

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    8. sij

    POV: You’re the rat in my $4700 New York apartment watching me post- mental breakdown

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    25. pro 2019.

    since it is the holidays I wanted to remind everyone that my uncle is the funniest man on Facebook

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  8. prije 8 sati

    Gonna catch some heat for this one...I apologize for nothing

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  9. prije 8 sati

    lot of guys saying they'd wish for world peace or the cure to cancer but my wish is to bury my face in your breasts. To kiss them gently b4 working my way to the rest of your body. We’d then begin making love, slowly increasing in passion. Our bodies wou- mom get out of my room

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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    10. tra 2019.

    Jesus - under 6 feet tall - nailed to a cross - didn’t have gucci flip flops - died a virgin My mom’s yoga instructor Jesús - 6’2 - nailed my aunt - 2 pairs of gucci flip flops - still alive, definitely fucks (see aunt)

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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    24. sij

    I was so lonely I texted the girl who robbed me last year...

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  12. prije 10 sati

    This is blowing up...any Iowans who see this: VOTE for Bernie Sanders tn

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    “I have a lot of twitter followers” - obnoxious - who cares - everyone knows you’re unemployed “I command a small army of depressed bisexuals” - intriguing - you could stage a military coup - people who won’t ask if you have a job

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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    “You can either live on your knees or die on your feet” I whisper to myself as I get up from the toilet after throwing up during the party before walking back into the kitchen like nothing happened and yelling “ALRIGHT WHO WANTS SHOTTTSSSSS”

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I see my mom scribbling something on her car with sharpie so I go outside and find this

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    me eating at 5 star restaurant: mm this is pretty good me eating at chick-fil-a: ahh the delicacy of lightly dredged chicken pairs perfectly with the cooked white potatoes, dusted with sea salt, and a crisp bottle of flavor optimized carbonated beverage. the pleasure is all mine

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  17. 2. velj

    Congrats to all of my followers, WE ARE the depressed bisexuals let’s go rumble

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  18. 2. velj

    “I have a lot of twitter followers” - obnoxious - who cares - everyone knows you’re unemployed “I command a small army of depressed bisexuals” - intriguing - you could stage a military coup - people who won’t ask if you have a job

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  19. 2. velj

    “I’m really only watching it for the commercials” - the most powerful gay in your friend group

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  20. 2. velj

    girls black out and post 18 ig stories then wake up the next morning at like 5am and delete all of them then put up a screenshot of a Billie Eilish song...nah Kayleeigh we all saw that shit

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  21. 2. velj

    Just threw up in the middle of my morning run, I contain multitudes 👍🙂

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