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bob saget
@bobsaget
I like long walks on the beach...and then to be dragged through the sand by an off-road vehicle, and then hurled off a catapult.
BobSaget.combit.ly/BobSagetsHereF…Joined May 2009

bob saget’s Tweets

Oh. My. God. I spend my day cleaning and vacuuming and sanitizing everything in the house. I have become Danny Tanner.
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Devastated. Met Norm in Ottawa when he was in my audience at 17 years old. Been close for decades. We have lost a comedic genius. No other voice in comedy has been as uniquely prolific, brazen, dark, hilarious, and heartfelt. Love you forever, Norm.
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I Got Broads In Atlanta Twisting Dope, Lean, And The Fanta Credit Cards And The Scammers Hitting The Licks In The Bando.
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So sad is the passing of Alan Thicke. Such a good husband, father, brother, and friend. He will be deeply missed. Rest in peace dear Alan.
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If my birthday card is not delivered to me on my actual birthday, I refuse to accept it —as it is thereby a fraudulent birthday card.
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Thinking about Robin Williams today as a lot of us are. I always wonder why we have to lose so many good people too soon and other crawdads are walkin’ around pooping up the world. Maybe one day it’ll make sense.
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I’ve lost two sisters, so on this Sunday night I’m just saying if you’re lucky enough to have siblings you love, let them know, and spend as much time with them as you can.
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So sad about the loss of George Segal. I grew up loving his films, from “Where’s Poppa?” to Sidney Lumet’s “Bye Bye Braverman,” to “The Hot Rock.” I got to work with him several times. This was last year at lunch. My deep sympathies to his family and friends.
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Married to the money, introduced her to my stove. Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low.
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You don't want no problems, want no problems with me You don't want no problems, want no problems with me Yep, yep!
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Loving beyond words being on tour —And doing an all new show of standup and music. Hope to see you out there. More dates being added continually as we go further into 2022... For tickets, go to: BobSaget.com
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#TBT Happy healthy 4/20 everybody- "Marijuana's not a drug, I used to suck d--k for coke...Now THAT'S an addiction!" My kids are so proud.
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I woke up this morning with a big smile on my face. But you couldn’t see it ‘cause my wife was sitting on it.
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This pic was obvi pre-show but holy crap I loved that amazing audience tonight at the Hard Rock Live Orlando !! A perfect first show of 2022!! That was the fastest Hour & 45 minutes ever. Thanks everyone in Orlando and beyond who were there.
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When I go to a restaurant and my server says "enjoy guys." Does he mean enjoy "guys?" Because I will if the waiters are hot enough.
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Never thought I’d say this or think it.... I wish I could be Danny Tanner ‘til the end of 2020 to just hug all the people suffering— and tell them it’s going to be okay. Of course while synthesizer music plays under my empathetic words.
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I just had a COVID test and I’m wondering if the doctor was legit. They’re supposed to put the swab in your butt and then put it in your mouth to see if you have a sense of taste, right?
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You belong among the wildflowers You belong in a boat out at sea Sail away, drift off the hours You belong somewhere you feel free ~Tom Petty
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My Anaconda don't... My Anaconda don't... My Anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun. ~ Nicki Minaj
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If the Beatles released “All You Need Is Love” today, sadly, so many would say F U. But it’s true. And it’s missing. And it’s not able to be in the Zeitgeist. All you really need is love. I know, F me.
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Sometimes I still wonder... What ever happened to predictability? The milk man, the paper boy, the evening TV? How did I get delivered here? Somebody tell me please This old world's confusing me.
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Fred Willard. The dear hilarious kind man we just lost. Here am I with he and Martin Mull while shooting a documentary about Martin. Seeing them having fun together reminiscent of the Fernwood days was truly a joy. Rest In Peace dear Fred.
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Weird? I went online the other night to make sure I was registered to vote. They had no record of me in the system. I called and reregistered. I suggest you all go online in your respective states and MAKE SURE you are still registered to vote. 🤔
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Haven’t been to therapy in weeks but I figured something out all by myself – – I get moody when I don’t get no booty.
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Wishing you all a good Sunday. That’s it. Just tweeting something positive some people may rip apart ‘cause that’s what they do. But what the hell…Wishing you all a good Sunday.
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My friend, my dad, the funniest biggest hearted of them all. A beautiful husband and father. My heart is broken. Rest In Peace. Don Rickles.
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I got broads in Atlanta Twistin' dope, lean, and the Fanta Credit cards and the scammers Hittin' off licks in the bando ~ Desiigner
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I just figured out after thirty years why Full House was so popular. It had a lot of love in it. And still does with Fuller House. And man, as Burt Bacharach and Hal David said, “What the world needs now is love sweet love...”
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Just a small suggestion – Something that seems to be working for me through all this… Perhaps take in a little less news and listen to a little more music.
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I miss my mom, especially today. She was a good woman, a loving wife, a caring mother, and a fantastic defroster and microwaver. Happy Mother’s Day everyone.
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Every day I'm hustlin' Every day I'm hustlin' Every day I'm hustlin' Every day I'm hustlin' Every day I'm hustlin'
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Next year on Cinco de Mayo, taco bowls will still be available. But you may have to have someone slide them under the wall from Mexico.
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We are in danger of destroying ourselves by our greed and stupidity. We cannot remain looking inwards at ourselves on a small and increasingly polluted and overcrowded planet. ~ Stephen Hawking
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I don’t know why everyone has to be so angry. I meet lots of people and so many of them just want to live in peace with everyone. Peace out. ✌️
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I'm never gonna dance again Guilty feet have got no rhythm Though it's easy to pretend I know you're not a fool ~ George Michael
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One of the biggest challenges in life is to have a positive outlook when you're going through difficult times. Here's to staying positive.
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Some people say kissing is more intimate than sex… I guess, if you’re kissing someone’s butt hole.
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