If someone divides a complex thing into two categories as part of an argument, resist responding with "well it is probably a spectrum." Ex: A: Some engineers care about product while others love engineering for its own sake B: Most people are probably both to some extent A: k
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It can be tempting since, especially if the person sharing the idea didn't make it clear, it is an easy way to feel like you are making the thing more nuanced. Usually though the person sharing agrees and the response is a distraction.
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Also I say "resist" and not "don't say it" because I'm mainly just recommending that you don't open with that response. Try to think of something better. You'll know whether it was fake nuance on your part once you're further into the conversation.
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Also, not tweeting this after someone did this to me. @devonzuegel shared @juliagalef's post with me on people who prioritize Care vs. Respect (https://www.facebook.com/julia.galef/posts/10102875978742342 …) and I caught myself almost saying "well most people probably care about both in different situations"
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