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riese
@autowin
ceo of autostraddle.com, podcast
@tolandback
. writer, editor & lgbtq+ market consultant. dead. any pronouns.
Los Angeles, CAinstagram.com/autowin/Joined July 2008
795 Following
15.7K Followers

riese’s Tweets

riese
@autowin
Sure lesbian sex is great but have you tried sitting next to your crush while every nerve in your body is tightly attuned to exactly how much of their thigh is touching your thigh at any given moment and how much more of their thigh could touch your thigh perhaps soon maybe
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riese
@autowin
Every time a pair of lesbians pass another pair of lesbians on the street and, after passing, the individuals in each pair turn to one another and whisper “LESBIANS,” a new lesbian is born - Deuteronomy
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riese
@autowin
if any of the homophobes who hated A League of Their Own would prefer a Prime Video mid-century period piece that completely erases queer people from locations in which they absolutely existed, may i suggest The Marvelous Mrs Maisel
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riese
@autowin
All these haters claiming not all women were lesbians in the 1940s have never read “meet molly: an american girl” and it shows
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riese
@autowin
When RENT came out in the early 90s my bisexual mom (her name is Maureen) had just left her boyfriend Mark for a woman and it was a lot
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riese
@autowin
Where is that dive bar you always see in lesbian movies where sad lesbians go to make bad decisions with other sad lesbians
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riese
@autowin
btw
@autostraddle
found out #ODAAT had a lesbian character 'cause a reader told us. that's how we learned of queers on Gypsy, Everything Sucks, OITNB, Mindhunter, Haunting of Hill House, etc. It was never Netflix.They never did ad campaigns w/us & never gave me advance screeners.
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riese
@autowin
Buttigieg claiming to have won the caucus is the most dubious declaration of status to come out of Iowa since Jenny Schecter allegedly graduated from the Iowa Writers Workshop
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riese
@autowin
The thing about lesbian sex is that you have to have it before dinner because after dinner, somebody’s stomach is going to hurt
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riese
@autowin
many queer shows have been axed after 1-2 seasons over the past few years. this year, Gen Q & Work in Progress & Gentleman Jack & Batwoman all got renewals. Know what else those shows have in common? they did direct ad buys with
@autostraddle
. Just saying...
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Autostraddle
@autostraddle
#TheLWordGenerationQ and #WorkInProgress have been renewed for ten-episode second seasons! bit.ly/2sqt4Jq
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riese
@autowin
Prime Video has a super hot lesbian television property in its hands right now (#ALeagueOfTheirOwn) and could be retaining queer members year round with a robust slate of content but instead they’re cancelling #thewilds and #PaperGirls, which is bad business & idk homophobic
Quote Tweet
Deadline Hollywood
@DEADLINE
‘Paper Girls’ Canceled By Prime Video After One Season, Will Be Shopped By Legendary Television deadline.com/2022/09/paper-
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riese
@autowin
Ladies if he: - takes two years to get to the only part of the story you actually care about - keeps all his clothes on when you make out - only takes you on 4-minute dates - suddenly dies in your arms he's not your man. he's a lesbian storyline.
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riese
@autowin
Last night
@autostraddle
had its biggest traffic spike ever when sue bird kissed Megan Rapinoe and for five minutes the entire world was googling “Olympics basketball gay”
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Autostraddle
@autostraddle
Meet the 13 gay women basketball players of the #Tokyo2020  #Olympics  bit.ly/2UOCBIk
Chelsea Gray and Brittney Griner
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riese
@autowin
every time i watch a documentary about an imprisoned murderer these days my #1 thought is "how did this man who lives in Waupun Correctional Institution find a wife where as I, a lesbian who lives in West Hollywood, have not"
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riese
@autowin
Kristen Stewart in a lesbian rom com Dayenu Kristen Stewart in a clea Duvall directed lesbian rom com Dayenu Kristen Stewart in a holiday themed clea Duvall directed rom com Dayenu Kristen Stewart and Mackenzie Davis in a holiday themed clea Duvall rom com IM GOING TO DIE
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Joanna Robinson
@jowrotethis
KRISTEN STEWART. MACKENZIE DAVIS. HOLIDAY-THEMED GAY ROM-COM. WRITTEN AND DIRECTED BY CLEA DUVALL. PAGING @kristinnoeline variety.com/2019/film/news
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riese
@autowin
Someon invent a dating app called “either / or” where you pick only matches you are down to fall in love with OR be friends with. You go out with an open mind towards either and then decide along the way. This is a good idea right I’m not just high
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riese
@autowin
A Pride celebration focused on speaking up against oppression, where corporate floats are replaced by queers with signs/flags in cars; where instead of $25 margaritas there’s free water bottles, where everyone who wants to march can — that was LA today. A thing to be proud of.
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riese
@autowin
my god i'm so sad. this face, this person, told the first coming out story on tv that i actually related to. writing recaps is an intense process, you're spending entire days for weeks and weeks with these characters. they become a part of you. something is missing, now.
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Autostraddle
@autostraddle
Naya Rivera is dead at 33. Her body was recovered from Lake Piru today after a six-day search. bit.ly/3iL5kVD
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riese
@autowin
We are all out here having intense anxiety while watching TV whenever maskless people enter a populated indoor space or touch a stranger or take a train or kiss or hug or eat in a restaurant or drink at a bar or take an elevator even if the show was shot in 2005 right
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riese
@autowin
twitter tell me which literary novels / memoirs (NOT explicitly labeled as erotica or erotic romance) have the hottest lesbian sex scenes in them! asking for an article. an article that will benefit us all.
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riese
@autowin
Replying to
@autowin
meanwhile the writers & talent behind #ODAAT have been incredible, giving us SO MUCH access and support, which's often hard for us to attain b/c ppl tend to not take queer women seriously. I really hope this show finds a new home!
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riese
@autowin
in my dream last night i told mariska hargitay that i'd felt unsafe all day but now that i was with her, i felt safe, and she cried about how sad it is that women feel the safest around actors who play detectives on TV, and she looked beautiful even in tears
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riese
@autowin
they keep saying "cats" is a box office bomb but every queer person i know has gotten high and gone to see cats. it is the movie event of the holiday season!
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riese
@autowin
Tfw when someone finds a partner and falls in love before you’re done researching and internally debating whether or not they might be open to maybe saying yes to possibly going on a date with you if you were to ask them someday maybe
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riese
@autowin
It’s funny how the people complaining the loudest about this allegedly upcoming lesbian extinction are also the people doing the most to present lesbians as inherently transphobic, exclusionary, illogical, irrational and just plain mean. And bad at editing AND rock collecting tbh
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riese
@autowin
I wonder if the boy I had a crush on when I was 13 thinks about me as much as I enter my default password based on his name
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riese
@autowin
Can someone write a graphic novel called QUARINTINNNAAAAA and it’s about being quarantined with Tina Kennard
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riese
@autowin
this is an important and resonant piece you should all read that i loved very much but WHY IS AUTOSTRADDLE NEVER MENTIONED IN ANY OF THESE STORIES. like... never. being for gay women doesn't make survival any easier. it's actually harder!
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Longreads
@Longreads
"These publications did not die by their own hand... These sites died because their inherent value did not translate into monetary value in a capitalist system run by men who only know how to monetize women by selling them out." @SorayaRoberts longreads.com/2018/12/07/my-
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riese
@autowin
“Cats” is about a bunch of lesbians in a mid size midwestern city who all want to get into NYU
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riese
@autowin
Bette Porter and Elizabeth Warren: two brilliant women candidates with big plans. Both disproportionally popular amongst lesbians, both with a background in education, both battling white men screaming at them on the campaign trail. Both failed to win. In this essay I will
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riese
@autowin
AfterEllen has been publishing blatantly trans misogynistic content for two years. The only thing that changed today was ​that ​their latest hate piece and the video they tweeted ​had more deliberately incendiary ​headlines than usual.
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riese
@autowin
stories like heather's seem to get lost in political & cultural discourse which focuses on a life or death binary. # of cases, % of deaths. a real look at COVID's impact would include the # or % of ppl experiencing long term health consequences. read this if you haven't yet.
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Heather Hogan
@theheatherhogan
Today, 8 months after COVID, I slowly walked 2 blocks to Rite Aid today to pick up the prescriptions I need now every day. $150/month for meds. $200/month for Liquid IV, supplements, etc. Two blocks is my limit of walking for this week. Wear a mask, y'all. For everyone's sake. twitter.com/theheatherhoga…
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riese
@autowin
i am so tired of big brands flooding autostraddle with requests for coverage of their pride collection / events / partnerships when they could very easily buy direct advertising on our website for their brand which btw is also a way to support lgbtq communities!
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riese
@autowin
some changes!
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Autostraddle
@autostraddle
With enthusiasm for the future, @autowin has decided to step down as Autostraddle’s Editor in Chief — she’ll still be here full-time as CEO/CFO and a writer — and is excited to pass the torch to new EIC @thatkamala and new Deputy Editor @carmencitaloves. bit.ly/2B5N889
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riese
@autowin
our government is a government of dark magic wholly devoted to investigating imaginary problems and ignoring real ones
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Yashar Ali 🐘
@yashar
NEW: The Trump administration wants to investigate and sue colleges that discriminate against white applicants. nytimes.com/2017/08/01/us/
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riese
@autowin
Replying to
@autowin
in conclusion trans women are women, they are always welcome on autostraddle and are a vital, necessary part of our queer community — as friends, as girlfriends, as wives, as co-workers, as artists — and if u're not letting trans women into ur spaces YOU ARE MISSING OUT
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riese
@autowin
*looks up from the post i'm writing about how 2017 is the start of women & queer ppl ushering in a new and far more innovative golden age of television*
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Square profile picture
IndieWire
@IndieWire
With television’s golden age tarnished by Louis C.K., Kevin Spacey and others, the medium’s brightest era has gone dark: bit.ly/2hqX1n8
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riese
@autowin
how's this slogan: "please donate to to us so i can stop spending every damn day brainstorming slogans & writing pleas for money & planning fundraising and can instead get back to ranking female star trek characters by lesbianism and writing sad stories about breakups"
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riese
@autowin
also it's CHOICE to complain about the eradication of independent lesbian and women-owned businesses while patronizing your local starbucks, which you visit so regularly that you're obsessively acquainted with every employee
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riese
@autowin
Also I did enjoy the happiest season film very much. Kristen Stewart was great a++ would lesbian Christmas movie again. Loved her gay suits + her little ribbon tie! (?) Dan Levy: a delight! Harper is a bad girlfriend. Hoping for happiest season 2: Fury Road
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riese
@autowin
Jane is the only member of that family who should be allowed to bring guests to her home for the holidays, the rest of them are truly terrible hosts
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riese
@autowin
I had a dream last night where I was about to go home with a girl and then realized I hadn’t shaved or waxed in weeks bc of quarantine, which made me remember quarantine; which then essentially made me cancel my own sex dream...... even my subconscious has given up
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riese
@autowin
based on reactions from millennial lesbians, the most impressive thing about me remains that I attended the original Lilith Fair
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riese
@autowin
what i've learned from two fyre festival documentaries is that ppl would rather invest & give money to an idiot with a zero success rate for an imaginary event than a smart person (me) who runs a real, successful event that grows every year (mine)
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riese
@autowin
Oh you’re lesbians? Which one of you takes Amy Ray’s part on “Closer to Fine” and who takes Emily’s
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riese
@autowin
If Taylor Swift wants to headline a pride event then she has to come out at the event Sorry those are the rules !!
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riese
@autowin
💖i don't know who needs to hear this but getting married or buying a house will not fix your relationship, it will only make breaking up more expensive💖
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riese
@autowin
i can't believe i wrote this over a decade ago and it would probs take ten minutes to edit it to seem like i wrote it yesterday
Quote Tweet
Autostraddle
@autostraddle
"And in the end, maybe the only person still waiting for their piece of Britney Spears… is Britney Spears." bit.ly/3qkbQa9 #FreeBritney
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riese
@autowin
fighting male supremacy, misogyny, homophobia & anti-lesbianism requires fighting ACTUAL MEN! NOT bi women who date men or amab trans women
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riese
@autowin
allergist: alternately, i'd advise that you avoid going outside, sage and cats me: i'm going to die alone allergist: ....... me: i'm a lesbian allergist.... me: sorry i mean "ok let's do the allergy shots"
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riese
@autowin
well i've read the internet and it looks like we should: completely freak out not freak out completely freak out not freak out completely freak out not freak out completely freak out not freak out completely freak out not freak out completely freak out not freak out completely f
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riese
@autowin
Do u ever think about how all the government has to do to curb this surge without gutting the economy is lock us down and deliver federal financial aid to small businesses and individuals but instead of doing that they’re just not doing it lol
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riese
@autowin
I know Shane left Carmen at the altar but also Carmen’s wedding gift to Shane was hiring two white lesbians in Ed Hardy to rap about how to eat pussy for Shane’s bachelor party.......
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riese
@autowin
! ! ! ! ! ! !!!!!
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Square profile picture
Tegan and Sara
@teganandsara
We love @autostraddle We think they do excellent work and give voice to so many important stories, points of view and topics that relate to LGBTQ+ women. There aren't many sites that do. Please consider supporting them. autostraddle.biz
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riese
@autowin
ok what if PR people were just clear with us about if there is gay in their thing or not. when u send me a movie or tv show screener or an event invite or a list of shows premiering on ur network just tell me in the email IF THERE IS GAY INSIDE IT just tell me where the gays are
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riese
@autowin
Rosie will be playing "Carrie" AND YES That Is Tina's Fiancée's Name
Quote Tweet
Autostraddle
@autostraddle
Generation Q’s first sliver of news has arrived: lesbian icon Rosie O’Donnell will play a “brash and kindhearted” public defender (whose name sounds familiar...) in Season Two and Jordan Hull (Angie) has been upped to series regular status! bit.ly/3n4N2QK #TheLWord #GenQ
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riese
@autowin
i think a much better way for @TheEllenShow to speak for the LGBT community would be to say "i love lesbians and bisexual women" while writing a check to autostraddle or buying portia a scissoring sweatshirt
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riese
@autowin
i was just thinking for no real reason about how Altered Carbon cost $7 million dollars an episode and how Netflix plastered L.A. bus stops with freaky 3-D ads that included fake MOVING human bodies inside fake bags and also how Altered Carbon is a bad show
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riese
@autowin
Listen you deserve good bathroom lighting. Hotness is 75% confidence and 25% presentation and lighting that makes you feel confident before walking out the door is truly a gift you can and should give yourself. Fluorescent lighting was invented by the patriarchy to drag u down !
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riese
@autowin
as actual lgbtq+ media, june is actually a very difficult month bc it's when all of mainstream media makes their own versions of the content we've been producing for 12+ years and it overtakes ours on search anyways, happy pride to good housekeeping
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riese
@autowin
is it normal to feel intense anxiety after about half of what you type to anyone in a chat or slack or DM or text, sub question is it normal to turn your phone over after texting someone bc of the deep shame you feel for having said literally anything ever
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riese
@autowin
i have been wondering for months now if there is anything on this scorched earth that would inspire my body to actually get out of bed before 10am in the year of our depression 2020 and it turns out the answer is yes, it was seeing this story at the top of my instagram feed
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Autostraddle
@autostraddle
Elliot Page is trans and we're so excited for him and all of us - also this means "Juno" is officially a trans film now. bit.ly/3ltfpXa
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riese
@autowin
I think it’s time for autostraddle to pivot from online media to producing a device that conducts hundreds of medical tests from just one drop of blood
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riese
@autowin
Sex slows down in a lot of troubled relationships but the assumption that “infrequent sex” = “rship in trouble” or “low quality rship” is actually really messed up!!!! Everybody’s sex drive is different, some couples *want* infrequent or no sex and that’s ok, anyway good morning
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riese
@autowin
just remembered in my dream last night i was dating max from "the l word." we fucked in a hotel room in tulum i've seen a pic of, went to a party at a club i went to in college, left early cuz he was sad / needed to process feelings about how mean bette + alice were to him
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riese
@autowin
twitter! plz tell me yr favorite movies for hot girl-on-girl / lesbian / queer women sex scenes, ASKING FOR AN ARTICLE
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riese
@autowin
AHEM there ~25 mentions of a "bisexual bob" / "bi bob" in the comments of the haircuts section of our queer stereotype survey. i need to know more about this haircut immediately, plz reply to this thread with pics for my important research!!
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riese
@autowin
shout out to house pets, the true heroes of 2018, for bringing beguiling naivety and consistent cuteness into our lives while democracy dies and the world burns
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riese
@autowin
i am obsessed with how much coronavirus stock photography is just.... straight couples trying to make out with masks on??
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riese
@autowin
i really relate to sci-fi heroines when they find out their lovers are actually bloodthirsty monsters who are full of lies
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riese
@autowin
Starbucks barista greeted me with “hi my name is Alex what’s yours?” and I froze bc Alex is the fake name i use at Starbucks so now what
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