People don't like it when I point out that everyone has a sense of roughly how attractive they are and how far up and down the attractiveness scale they can successfully flirt. Flirt to win anyway. It's charming when someone flirts outside of the scale but just for fun.
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I think the 'just for fun' part of that is the critical piece - when it gets desperate is when it gets challenging/dangerous.
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Yup it gets embarrassing. I sincerely hope we can develop as a species such that someone seriously flirting outside of their attractiveness zone is merely challenging/embarrassing rather than dangerous.
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Perhaps the dangerous is more about not reading the signals from the flirtee rather than simply being out of their league? ...and not reading signals often seems to be about self-absorption.
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Yes. This.
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In my experience the person can't read the signals because of overly complex signalling being hard for some neuro-atypicals, who are rarely dangerous. Admittedly my sample groups are people who come to libraries and nerds.
End of conversation
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