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Bartenders deserve a dollar for every beer they open because their profession encounters leagues more assholes than your average bear.
1 favoriteMade a remake of @ashleycarey "Indoor Parkour" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqvM9QVJU1M …
I wrote about the #FergusonDecision on my blog. I'm not posting it here. You can find it if you know where to go.
Why do we say “speedometer” when “speed gauge” is a hundred times easier to say? We don't check our "gasometer" because that is dumb.
"I don't know what you're talking about but that last thing you said is true so I agree with all of it." - Us with our political candidates.
There are too many fish in the sea.
Bus driver just asked if anyone had gum, everyone thought we misheard him, so he pulled over the bus to get some gum. I had gum :/
2 retweetsFeels weird, but this is my first ever political endorsement. Meet Steve Stokes: http://broketheinterweb.tumblr.com/post/100463368485/meet-steve-stokes … @Stokes4Congress
If you can't repair your own disk permissions, you can't walk me home.
2 retweets 4 favoritesEmpathetic doctors make me feel guilty for even bringing it up.
Listening to @rushtheband and I think my family would be happier in Canada. I just really think that.
Satan is a fool, God is kinda cool and Jesus could walk across the swimming pool.
ROSIE TRAN, ASHLEY CAREY: Rosie Tran (@funnyrosie) and Ashley Carey (@ashleycarey) join us! We talke... http://bit.ly/1s40p3k @d_seaman
Listen to our podcast! It's up now
#davidseamanhour
Regram via @d_seaman http://instagram.com/p/t1ofiashdx/
Money can't buy happiness because expensive stuff breaks sometimes. We just need to solve that.
People that are sympathetic to the value of their computer guy/gal's time off the clock are really good people.
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