And she actually got mad "This show is stupid, what does that even mean? How is that not just the same as our world? What's different about it?" "Well the 'stronger sex' look like women in our world but they're stronger like men"
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"But the reason men and women look different is that men are stronger! Men are stronger because they're physically bigger! Men being stronger is why they don't have to have long hair and makeup and women do!" (My mom's not a radfem, she's a conservative Christian, but even so)
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Anyway her surprisingly intense anger at a stupid science fiction TV show left me with a lot to think about "If men could have babies, they would BE women, and they'd have all the stuff we think of that makes women women, like being smaller and having breasts" stuck in my head
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I have to give credit to my mom in that from a very young age, probably unintentionally, she both raised my standards for science fiction "What if?" scenarios ("The question is what DOESN'T change if you flip X and Y") and got me thinking about feminism and gender
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I mean, I think she's wrong in the end, and the TERFs are wrong, but this conflict reveals where we are as a culture right now - it's the conflict over attempting to imagine the unimaginable
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Again, my mom's not a radfem, she's a conservative, but sometimes I think the difference between the two is how pissed off you feel on a given day
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There's a straight line from "Of course women are the weaker sex due to the biology of childbearing" to "Of course women do all the childrearing because of breastfeeding and hormonal bonding in utero Of course men are worse at those jobs, of course men work outside the home"
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Replying to @arthur_affect
I mean, the thing that is shockingly hard to see from inside it (which we all are) is how SPECTACULARLY culturally-dependent all of those ideas are. You can "of course" your way to basically any gender norm you want, and it'll seem perfectly reasonable from inside it!
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Replying to @iridienne
The idea that, for instance, it's natural for women to be the ones who are "vain" and focus a lot on their personal appearance (and wear makeup and heels and dresses) is non-obvious, even with all the assumptions of patriarchy
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Replying to @arthur_affect @iridienne
You can easily imagine a society just as patriarchal as ours, with many of the same assumptions -- especially the idea that "men do the active courting in romance" and "what makes men attractive is their wealth and achievements" -- and have men be the ones wearing lipstick
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That's what it was in fact like in a lot of the history of the West, which people today recoil from and make fun of ("those fruity aristocrats in France") Cf. viral "FUCK YOU BEAU BRUMMEL" thread
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Replying to @arthur_affect @iridienne
MRAs are trying to "reclaim" this now, with an appeal to evolutionary biology in the animal world, even ("peacocking")
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Replying to @arthur_affect @iridienne
MRA's invented the phrase "peacocking"?
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