I mean I agree but I also wish the perceived solution to this was letting women do what they want rather than pressuring men to meet the same standardshttps://twitter.com/ezwrites/status/1366241868065894400 …
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But shit I don't like it I mean... I don't think it actually stops at parity, I think raising standards for men as a "fairness" thing -- Female gaze! Eye candy for the ladies! Girl power! -- justifies accelerating pressures for everyone
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The standards for women are *also going up at the same time* and it's easier to defend that happening because "Hey we have high standards for everyone, equal opportunity"
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There was that article about PUA redpill communities straight up telling dudes to all go out en masse for cosmetic surgery to get their jawlines fixed etc.
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And, like, I'm pro-doing-whatever-you-want with your body but the way they talk about it is pretty ugly Directly analogizing it to market capitalism, "sexual market value" "If women are doing it then you need to do it and if you do it they won't have an excuse not to do it"
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It's like -- I am not defending all the free labor dads have extracted out of moms over the generations or saying that dads shouldn't be expected to parent But when people say the "solution" to childcare derailing women's careers is "husbands suck it up" I think we're doomed
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If the solution to "Nearly 100% of women get their lives derailed and careers ruined by having kids" is "Let's change it so 50% of women get their lives derailed and careers ruined, but 50% of the time it'll happen to the men!", then your solution is... not a good solution
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Even if it's the theoretically superior "We will *both* get our lives ruined but *only* 50% ruined" -- which is pretty hard to make work in real life, because careers don't scale that way like liquids in a container -- it's still bad Like that just should not be how it works
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If you don't come up with a way to have kids that isn't life-ruining at all, then that birthrate is still gonna plummet You're gonna have plenty of men like me who are like "Okay so rather than suck it up and get my life ruined because it's my gender's turn, I'm just opting out"
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End of conversation
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