I was, like, filled with facts about the product, about our competitors, about random shit the potential customer might want to chit-chat about I had *strong opinions* about selling in our market, about which territories were ripe pickings and which ones were duds
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And all of this fucking hurts to think back on I spent so much more energy during that time period thinking about this shit, getting better at something that *didn't matter* It was *so stupid* I haven't looked up the company once since I stopped working there
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God imagine if I'd spent that time able to fully focus on shit like taking improv or acting classes (which I was trying to juggle on top of my job at the time) Would I be a great stand-up comedian in New York today? Probably not, but I'd have enjoyed life a lot more
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Imagine if I'd had all that time to spend working on myself, or my relationships Or thinking about the world and trying to just be wiser, more insightful, more empathetic Maybe it wouldn't have worked but it'd at least have been more worth the effort
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Replying to @arthur_affect
This is hitting me hard, as someone in one of those 9-5-to-starving-artist transitions
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Replying to @life_minutiae @arthur_affect
Ultimately there's something to be said about the tremendous difficulty reaching for meaning and fulfillment in a nihilistic universe, but it's what we've got and there's no high score.
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Replying to @life_minutiae @arthur_affect
So you know, if I want to sing peppy anime songs, and that's more fulfilling than being a skilled tax lawyer fucking a bunch of buxom people, the latter is losing in this universe-constrained framework.
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Replying to @life_minutiae
I think a lot of people get as far as understanding that the world is hostile and unfair and doesn't give a shit about your happiness But then don't get why this means you're always playing *defense* against the world, and coming to *identify* with the world is toxic
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Replying to @arthur_affect @life_minutiae
Especially people with this lazy capitalist worldview Like yeah sure becoming a tax lawyer, if you can swing it, is a good way to play the game and keep the world at bay Doesn't mean it has any objective value, doesn't mean you're doing "the right thing"
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Replying to @arthur_affect @life_minutiae
This is particularly true of tax lawyers, who largely exist because the tax code is this byzantine monster that accreted over time that fucks people over pointlessly, that shameless rent-seekers -- including tax lawyers -- *actively fight to keep from being reformed*
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So I mean congrats, you're winning the game for now, but it doesn't make the game any less arbitrary and stupid, and for all you know a few years down the pike people might get sick of the whole thing and overthrow the whole system and then where will you be
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Replying to @arthur_affect
I mean, mostly they're working to make the lives of those people who in their one shot at this miserable brief existence rolled a slightly higher shitty number than everyone else get slightly more of an edge.
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Replying to @life_minutiae @arthur_affect
Which you know, if you want to do shitty wireheading then sure, but I respect let's play streamers and street buskers way more
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