There are two parties to this decision, one of them determined to enact cruelty and one trying to soften the cruelty to an endurable level while still enabling it And while their conflict with each other may be very passionate it's still experienced by the kid as abuse
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And, like, you can HEAR THEM yelling at each other in the kitchen "For God's sake, he's a child, he's growing, he needs nourishment!" "The spoiled little shit's fat enough"
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Sorry for some of us the whole experience of being able to see and hear people, like, debating and litigating and negotiating exactly how much they're allowed to abuse you is... kind of visceral
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