Order of the Stick riffed on the other bodily fluids from Churchill's speech, and while sweat vampires and tear vampires both seem more benign than blood vampires, they're both kind of distressing in almost opposite ways
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Replying to @arthur_affect @Nymphomachy
Like tear vampires are a variant on emotional vampires but grosser There's nothing actually evil about sweat vampires at all, but... eww
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Replying to @arthur_affect @Nymphomachy
Hanging out at the locker room in the gym and just diving and clamping onto your armpit and/or your crotch
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Replying to @arthur_affect @Nymphomachy
Perched on top of your head and just constantly running its tongue over your forehead, wringing out your hair...
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Replying to @N7IRL @arthur_affect
Would they have like an elephant trunk instead of fangs, some kind of suction tool that just engulfs the scalp and absorbs all the moisture through tiny bristles
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This is beginning to sound very Lovecraftian.
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easier than buying shampoo, if you play your cards right
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Ha ha just this massive sandpaper tongue scraping every trace of sweat off your skin You wouldn't have to shower
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Replying to @arthur_affect @Nymphomachy and
I mean cats seem to enjoy it
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now I'm picturing, like, a Lickitung with cat ears
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I remember how on the anime Lickitung was this unstoppable new menace of a Pokemon because they were all too grossed out to fight it
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It's like if there were a starter Pokémon for the character Moist from DR. HORRIBLE
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Replying to @Nymphomachy @arthur_affect and
The Squick type is OP against almost every type except Fire to which it is weak, giving us the saying "Kill it with fire".
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