I think this article - "A Mathematician's Lament" by Paul Lockhart - is something everyone should read Not exactly an answer to your questions and not exactly aimed at math beginners, unfortunately, but it's a really engaging rant about this topic https://www.maa.org/sites/default/files/pdf/devlin/LockhartsLament.pdf …https://twitter.com/graciegcunning/status/1298804338727489536 …
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And I think Lockhart does a really good job of at least getting across to non-math people - like me - how the way he thinks about math is all about those questions and it's night and day from the stuff bad math classes make you think math is about
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(Kind of like how you'll find a lot of professional authors, including really famous ones whose books are taught in school, who don't have much nice to say about their 7th grade English lit classes)
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