If I actually believed all or even most kids had parents who were genuinely both willing and able to look out for their interests on their behalf it would be much easier for me to agree with you
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Conservatives think this is in itself a social problem and try to push back on it Bryan Caplan's "Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids" was a book that famously took the stance that parents should give themselves a break, that parents are too hard on themselves
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"You've already done the most important thing, you've given the child the gift of existence in the first place As long as you meet your other obligations at a basic level you should view bringing them into the world as a wholly positive thing" I hate this mindset passionately
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A parent had five kids, does good on the first. Decent on the second. And then lassez faire on the rest (and it shows once they grow up). Yeah today’s consensus is that they should have stopped at the second, but I don’t think there is a right answer
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There may not be a right answer, but having them stop once they can't do the emotional labor is a good answer.
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Every single parenting failure that I beat myself up for TODAY would have been prevented by a hardy social support system with communal care.
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Going on 16, my kid is awesome. Delightful to be around, rock solid morals, whip smart. I'm proud of him, but not proud of myself. If I spend more than an instant reflecting on "raising" him I burst into angry tears. The tests parents judge themselves by are countless and costly.
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