So after sleeping on this I just want to add that you could kind of encapsulate this in how Freddie Mercury and David Bowie are treated as queer icons but Kurt Cobain isn't Like, I love Freddie Mercury but I would never be able to emulate that kind of energy Cobain, I can dohttps://twitter.com/Nymphomachy/status/1263980060412911618 …
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Some speculate that Kurt was a closeted trans woman, which (coupled with the success of Nirvana) Courtney wouldn't allow to happen because of her own homophobia.
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Anything is possible, although being a trans woman doesn't automatically mean you're into sex with men
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In my experience, it's usually the internalized homophobia/possessive toxic masculinity. In my last relationship, we practically tripped over our own shoelaces into FFM threeways, but it took YEARS for us to finally make the MMF threeway happen.
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