Based on an AITA post I just saw, help me out a second, as an intersex woman who will never conceive. Is there an idea taken as axiomatic that a person who willfully remains absent from the occasion of their partner giving birth is committing an unspeakable moral dereliction?
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That said it was still the norm for the father to be present, just not in the same room The 101 Dalmatians movie treats the dad nervously pacing and chain smoking because he has no idea what's going on in there as a familiar comic cliché
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But anyway yeah from a historical standpoint it's interesting It was considered a major advance of second-wave feminism to establish that childbirth wasn't a "woman thing" and the husband was not only capable of being but obligated to be the mom's primary support at the time
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Up through the late middle, I think, and maybe longer depending on region: I think my dad was relatively unusual in being present for my birth, which was in 1982 but in rural PA.
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My dad went from being banned from the delivery room for my birth to encouraged to be in the room for my sister's. This was between 1974 and 1977. It happened fast.
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Fun fact: My then-wife had an emergency C-Section, so I wasn't in the room for my daughter's birth. My daughter was not immediately conscious because of the general anesthesia her mom got. I like to say that none of us was really in the room for her birth.
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Having gone through this with my partner a few months back, the old "dad waits with a cigar" mode seems unconscionable. Like being there through labor, if at all possible, seems the least one could do if they actually view their partner as a valued, coequal human being.
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I mean I think that's a very thoughtful mindset and I also think a very similar mindset (not between partners) probably led to a very important surgery of mine going a way that will probably mess with my head for the rest of my life
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