David Thorpe

@Arr

I am the first in the East, the first in the West, and the greatest philosopher in the Western World.

SF
Joined March 2008
1,139 Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

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  1. 6 hours ago

    All dogs not claimed within 24 hours will be incinerated. Thanks for co-writing this.

    42 retweets 64 likes
  2. 7 hours ago

    I wish I was friends with David Puddy

    6 retweets 28 likes
  3. 18 hours ago

    i made this image for something i wrote years ago but i think it still works out of context

    17 retweets 102 likes
  4. Aug 22

    How Things Work

    270 retweets 245 likes
  5. Aug 22

    My secret weird fetish is provocative media outlets being shut down by shadowy billionaires

    8 retweets 52 likes
  6. Aug 21

    The Three Ages of Man

    7 retweets 35 likes
  7. 11 May 2012

    There was also something where Larry King said "you should pull my balls apart almost to the point where it might be a huge problem."

    76 retweets 295 likes
  8. 11 May 2012

    Can someone find the news story about Larry King hiring a cop dressed as a prostitute and telling her to spread his balls super far apart?

    62 retweets 226 likes
  9. Aug 20

    For Halloween this year I'm going to be The Tiny Synth Fanfare Toot Riff From Sorry By Justin Bieber

    7 retweets 63 likes
  10. Aug 20

    Since the advent of language hath man sought the words to tell the tale of the 9 Celebs Who Went From Fit To Fat

    9 retweets 64 likes
  11. Aug 19

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    44 retweets 109 likes
  12. Aug 19

    Top 5 dumbshit song titles on new Metallica album: 5. Halo on Fire 4. Here Comes Revenge 3. Spit Out the Bone 2. Am I Savage? 1. ManUnkind

    45 retweets 117 likes
  13. Aug 19

    Cover of the new Metallica album looks like a magazine ad for a PS2 game

    50 retweets 257 likes
  14. Aug 19

    Today is my 3-year anniversary at work. Here's my reply to HR's congratulation note

    50 retweets 256 likes
  15. Aug 19

    wow hell is a lot more boring than i thought it would be. i wish i could remember how i died

    15 retweets 128 likes
  16. Aug 19

    59 retweets 136 likes
  17. Aug 17

    THR SUN GOES DOWN THE LAP TOP COMES OUT

    1,576 retweets 3,027 likes
  18. Aug 18

    pre-computers,"hackers" were onion salesmen who'd take ur money & go "ok hold on" & do the "pretend to walk downstairs behind a couch" shit

    22 retweets 65 likes
  19. Aug 18

    Still got it

    4 retweets 80 likes
  20. Aug 17

    Q: is this a real movie or did I just photoshop this

    51 retweets 225 likes

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