Anna Brandberg

i have been punched, kicked, thrown, knocked down by anywhere up to 10 people. usually 3 - 4. i have been hunted through the streets of the city, tracked down and jumped, been followed and stalked. because i was perceived to be *one of them*. and i thought it was my fault.

"what is wrong with me" i thought. "why am i a target". even "am i actually gay? what do they see that i dont". so i blamed myself. but it wasn't my fault. i was just a quiet weird kid who wanted to be left alone. but the experience would not allow me to stay that way.

one day i got a little brave and was starting to get super fucking done with all this. i walked past a gang that took particularly unkindly to my presence. they were bothered by this, and waited until i'd walked past to open with a punch to the back of the head.

the resulting beating was nothing new, until i felt the rope slide around my neck. then it finally sunk in. if i didn't fight, and win, right now, i was dead. so i did. i wrestled free, punched, kicked, i bit someone's face. they were shocked, and i had a moment of opportunity.

so i ran, and ran, and ran, and screamed, and cried, because *how the fuck does anyone think this is okay?! what the FUCK is wrong with these people?* and after that, i wasn't afraid of dying anymore. so i happily walked into fights that were mine to lose, and that scared them.

so when i see bigots and homophobes tossing around hate speech and finding ways to subjugate lgbt+ people, i see red because i know what happens, what the real-world result of that hate is. it ends in blood, and if you don't fight it, death.

so 加油pridemonthmotherfuckers, get out there and don't let anyone take away your right to exist.

much later in life i would come to realize i was a little bit bi but given what i'd already suffered on the basis of sexuality, it hardly felt like an identity point. not relevant to the story but felt disingenuous to not include. be happy with yourself for who you are <3 love u