I was bored: pastebin.com/4XqGfYnD
it gives you synchronously accessible async values in JS; rather fragile but uses only oldschool JS
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for "disregard the syntactic sugar" values of oldschool
also I did not clean this up at all, or test it exhaustively
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I already found enough bugs in this to warrant bug spray but at least this idea from 2010 is out of my system now