Two thoughts: First, selfishly, losing a grandparent is a very painful experience. It's not as painful as losing a parent,. sibling, or children, but it is still VERY painful for a lot of people. Second, the utilitarian calculus should consider how painful dying of COVID is.
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For the relative pain of different extremely bad things, see:https://forum.effectivealtruism.org/posts/gtGe8WkeFvqucYLAF/logarithmic-scales-of-pleasure-and-pain-rating-ranking-and …
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