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often times this experiment will increase contrast e.g. you realize that you were following this guru *purely* because you wanted a leg up over society. this naked ambition brought to light would feel wrong and unhelpful at this funeral
or you realize u were just following someone who was a distraction from the pain you couldn't deal with. you realized you were completely unqualified for this speech so you ran away from it into whatever was selling the most convincing self delusion at the time
or you realize you were running back to some kind of familiarity, an attempt at recreating the familial safety you had previously rejected as too stifling and old fashioned. running back to some mommy/daddy figure bc the world slapped you so hard your heart started bleeding
these correspond to bringing a sociopath, a clown, and a priest. the priest is reasonable. it just makes it quite clear that u r still a child.
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