e.g. ignoring your children b/c you were overly controlled growing up. in your mind it “averages out”. you KNOW the “right” thing is balance in the middle but b/c you can’t let the past go you *have* to be on the extreme opposite of your trauma.
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these are rationalizations over a much more mundane Real reason. which is that balance is hard. it takes far less energy to he toppled over on the bike to the Left or to the Right. you just lay there.
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balance requires actually keeping your eyes open and hundreds of micro adjustments every minute. it’s “hard” but also “easy”
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the more severe cases of imbalance are due to not knowing how to ride a bike. it’s not the fear of the physical pain of falling but the fear of the social embarrassment.
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this creates “addictions” where you get stuck in a state of permanent overcompensation with no possible end. ironically, setting the “compensate” dial to Infinity ensure impossibility of ever resolving the original trauma!https://twitter.com/a_yawning_cat/status/1333339180601020416 …
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“nowness” thus implies 2 things: one is oppo-laziness. not the hard work self flagellating kind but the constant awareness that maintains flow states and bike balance. the other is oppo-fear. not the blindfolded retarded YOLO battlecry but facing your wounds with eyes wide open
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