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[Turning to drugs or some other non-human form of cope is a way of "Losing self" by giving up on self because one gives up on Other and self is considered just another kind of Other.]
"many people are capable of “loving” only pets and incapable of genuinely loving other human beings. Large numbers of American soldiers had idyllic marriages to “war brides”. But when their brides learned English, the marriages began to fall apart."
[keeping part of self mute or disabled in some way is also a method of maintaining the "loving relationship" with self]
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