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A spiritual path that walks backwards opens doors to more doors to more doors. It never ends. It's as futile as truly figuring out who you are, reversing entropy, or figuring out just why you said "book".
This can be tempting. That's because the doors in the direction of past are *unlocked* while the door to the (desired) future is often barred by the monster of Fear.
Fear is always THE single next door, even if it's a multi-tentacled monster that blocks many doors. (This fear analogy explains why opening this "One" door of dealing with fear leads to the "Many" doors of Freedom.)https://twitter.com/a_yawning_cat/status/1328968602784047109 …
To fight fear is to fight the hydra. The more you poke at it, the more powerful it becomes. The only way past it is to see what it truly is. It is an alarm system, a protector. Dumb as a dog, but in service to YOU.https://twitter.com/a_yawning_cat/status/1342200683374604288?s=20 …
This means that Fear is the border between your life and your death. It is rightfully impenetrable. The only way to push it back is to understand it. Understand WHY the safety measures are there. Understand WHY the dog is barking.https://twitter.com/a_yawning_cat/status/1342201239564550144?s=20 …
The greater your understanding, the more difficult and dangerous things you can do. You push back fear by befriending it, by having it show you where you need to improve.
Instead of memorizing a bunch of useless information (the trap of philosophy) you instead just do what you need to do. Take just that One More Step into fear. Not to punch it, but to hug it. (but also, don't just go up and hug starving rabies stray doggo)
E.g. an easy way to reproduce this dealing with fear is with exercise. Work to your and just do One More. Don't aim for a target, fail, and then beat yourself up. Truly sense your limit and just squeeze one one more. Not ten, just one. Like a kind teacher pushing you.
Incidentally, the target method or "planning" works by creating a False God. You push yourself to fulfill the requirements of the plan and lose touch with your inner sense of limit.
Whether or not you push yourself correctly is subject not to your inner attunement to your limits or to your fear but to how well past you was at predicting and controlling the future! "The healed mind does not plan."https://youtu.be/_qIGyry7wLo?t=1003 …
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