Desire for Perfect Guy can also be symptomatic of dysfunction even though it is an ideal. Tough Guy offers safety & protection in unsafe environments. Perfect Guy offers safety & protection in unsafe *mental* environments charged w/ judgement.
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If
feels threatened by
(physically or psychically) the desire is for something that makes
back down of their own volition. Otherwise the convo goes like:Show this thread -
"You make me feel unsafe, I'd never be w/ u" "Oh ok, no worries haha, I understand." (Internal dialogue: "HOW COULD YOU YOU SHALLOW ... etc ... I'M SUCH A NICE GUY"
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Being w/ Perfect Guy causes the internal dialogue to shift: "Why am I such a loser, I should work out more, make more money, read more philosophy, gain millions of followers, etc..." "Thanks god that guy left to climb that mountain. I was afraid to hurt his feelings."
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