People who are driven by wanting to "fix" their parent's relationships by creating a perfect one themselves often can be self-delusional. This is because they know the answer isn't X and feel overconfident in choosing the correct answer from A, B, C, D, E.....
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It builds great shining beacons of light like the pyramids that are effectively infinite in comparison to a single human lifespan but still nothing compared to Everything.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i93Z7zljQ7I …
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It's like going up to someone and saying "Follow me and you'll never experience any suffering in your life every again. I will attend to your every need." Which is so stupid.
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Sitting with yourself for a few brief moments and sense all the feelings. So many of them unsatisfactory. So many of them are uncontradictory in nature. You can't deal with chaos and not be dealing with chaos. It's not even linguistically possible!
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Shadow once dragged into the light dies just like a magic trick or a joke loses its magic when explained.
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Monks deal with this in an interesting way... They go full hobo and destroy their concept of home. Their first step is to reduce desire and pride to the extent that they can live anywhere based only on donations.
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Once this is done then the whole universe becomes home. There are dangers, but they are similar to falling down your stairs, raising your children wrong, divorce, etc...
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They have the same problems and the same feelings even if in unrecognizable form b/c of the changes they had to make for their lifestyle. Within this field of similar suffering though lies the background process of "I am home."
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It's the recognition that all homes are illusions. "I am home" implies "I have always been home." as well as "I will always be home" as well as "There are no homes".
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Looping back to the beginning. This "I am home" thought can be analyzed as "I" equals "home", which is the boundary action described earlier. If there are no homes, then there is no "I", then there is no division.
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A lot of the greatest pain we face happen as babies as each new negative thing is the Worst Thing That Has Ever Happened in Life. These experiences don't scar though b/c of this background idea of "I am home".
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The scars that run deep are the wounds caused when this protective idea weakens. In the teenage years for example, home can shift from parents to belongingness to a peer group. These lord of flies rafts are often even shittier than the parental ones build with blood and darkness.
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Home is the sanctifying place where everything can be understood and then forgiven. No... it's a place where understanding and forgiveness are the same thing..
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