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The reason I suspect the message can feel hateful at times is because it makes suffering an inevitable part of reality. It's the same message "Life is suffering", but delivered by a Strict Father archetype and feels mean rather than a Smiling Buddha.
It is also anti-feminine in a way because masculine energy is far better suited for taking on pain and suffering. (What culture so some undetermined extent is how much yin/yang energy is infused into each XX or XY baby)
Avatars of the Masculine are judged and ranked by how much suffering they can endure (and dish out...) by Avatars of the Feminine who judge and rank this way precisely because Suffering is the Ultimate Enemy to them.
For Yang energy, the "Obstacle is the Way" while for Yin energy it's about an existence without unnecessary suffering.
Some common messages that yin/yang try (and fail) to communicate to each other: yin -> yang: You're obstacles are fake. Sports is fake. Your career is fake. Do something REAL. yang -> yin: You have no idea how much Suffering this involves. You should be more grateful.
So... individuation is like learning to ride a bike. Your Unique Journey with balancing yin/yang left/right pedal is Unique to you. You can't read a book to learn it. You have to Do. The end result of individuation is a group of non-individuated bike riders.
They're still doing the same thing you do. Going from A to B. Maybe sometimes from C to D or back to A. But they seem to do so effortlessly and without pain, and often much faster.
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