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a_yawning_cat's profile
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@a_yawning_cat

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@a_yawning_cat

stray thoughts, loosely held. rat jaeger.

California, USA
aycat.substack.com
Joined December 2018

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    1.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      Your imaginary friend is actually your 'higher self'. That bully who tells you you're too fat and dumb is actually right. Except instead of being a great life coach, this life coach uses vitriol and punishment to 'encourage' you.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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    2.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      Everything this life coach tells you will be true in some way. (You can and should always be growing, always be living) Yet depending on how the message is delivered it can have hugely different effects.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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    3.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      You need to have the ability to befriend a bully. Most of us have never had this experience. We strive to be 'stronger' instead and bully the bully from a position of strength. Mentally we imagine the bully as a loser. Someone we could never befriend.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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    4.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      Our original bullies are often our father or mother figure scolding us, making us fear for our existences. If you don't have a bully figure in your life, perhaps the people you have to make amends with are your parents or caretakers.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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    5.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      We have to be able to be friends with our parents. But this is *hard*. Society tells us we can't be friends with super evil people like racist people and our parents are like super racist. "Stay away from black people"

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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    6.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      If there's a voice of satan it whispers only this "That is unforgivable." It shows you rapists, murderers, torturers, etc... It brings up genocide and torture.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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    7.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      Yet still.. if we traced through every individual's life and watched it from birth, we'd probably forgive everyone. We'd understand why. It's just that we don't care to. We can't. There's not enough energy to do so. Especially as we're busy with our own lives.

      1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
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    8.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      Forgive yourself. And if you can't because there's something you need to do? Then do it. That's the "work".

      1 reply 0 retweets 2 likes
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    9.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      It means really digging into why you're ashamed of yourself. Was it b/c of that time you looked stupid in front the whole class? When you were the skinniest/fattest ignored by all the girls/guys?

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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    10.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      What is the exact reason you sent your imaginary friend into purgatory and exile? If you can put into coherent thoughts exactly how you wounded yourself... you'll have reached the understanding necessary to forgive yourself.

      1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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       🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

      This isn't something in the 'past' btw... If you're hurting yourself it's something you're doing right now in the present. E.g. the act of replaying the past is something done in the present as is the act of imagining the future.

      1:13 AM - 24 Aug 2020
      • 1 Retweet
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      1 reply 1 retweet 1 like
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        2.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

          How you're wounding yourself is how you wounded yourself. Healing the present heals the past.

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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        3.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

          We have two ways of befriending ourselves. One is by casual day to day positive interaction. Over time, we just become friends. (e.g. classmates, colleagues, etc..) Another is when sharing an intimate moment, a 'spark'.

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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        4.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

          If you have a good relationship with yourself make sure to maintain it. Don't take it for granted. If you can't maintain a relationship with yourself, are you really ready to maintain one with someone else?

          1 reply 0 retweets 1 like
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        5.  🐈‏ @a_yawning_cat 24 Aug 2020

          So... give your imaginary friend a call ... To talk about the old days.

          0 replies 0 retweets 1 like
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        6. End of conversation

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