Friendship is mostly luck. Everyone is showing either "hatchet" or "palms" to everyone else. More "hatchet" to enemies, more "palms" to friends. Friendship is when 2 people cant "high five" each other and not be left hanging.
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The more you force people to interact, like chemicals, the more by chance you'll get palm-palm connection. Cultural rituals are like catalysts for palm-palm connections. Some work through trust like eye staring and dates.
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Cross cultural rituals though always pass through a violent phase. Each side responds in unbalanced violent ways until they're simultaneously tired. Both their hatchets drop at the same time to reveal palm-palm.
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If we do not create our protocols to increase palm-palm connections then we default to the natural and original one. War.
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