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1/ The mind can only hold one idea at a time. To pick one up is to put the other down. E.g. if a woman wants to be more than 'just' a woman often they accused to rejecting femininity.

2/ To hold two ideas in the mind you have to create a new one that is a combination of both. You can't do this on the fly for everyone you meet. Too many combinations. It's easier to put people into buckets.

3/ The internet has allowed us to individuate far more than previously possible. It's easier to pick up all sorts of hobbies with ease and expertise that would've have taken much longer in the past.

4/ Instead of a simple identity we can all be philosophers, writers, musicians, artists, etc.. Our ability to recognize individuality hasn't kept pace so we end up feeling alienated and unseen.

5/ Ironically, tech culture, which isn't exactly known for having diversity offers a potential solution. Raising standards.

6/ So what if you can learn piano or juggling in a few hours over youtube what previously required traveling the world and years of meeting people and practice. Everyone else can do the same.

7/ If you refuse to label yourself and keep your identity small no matter how great you feel you are at something, there's less room to feel unseen and less opportunity for ego to get triggered.

8/ Competition, bell curves & the free market check ego via global calibration. Without it all you have is your circle of friends which fall into the traps of (1) feel good circle jerk (2) thinly veiled dog-eat-dog competition (3) cold professional pragmatism