Try to make sense of all the people I've met who've given me an 'evil' vibe and realized it's they fulfill this question: "Would this person be happy being a dictator?"
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A common mistake I've made though is extrapolating trying to control me specifically to being 'evil' in general. Especially feels bad when I realize they were hamfistedly trying to 'control' me to be their friend, e.g. they wanted (to beat) love or respect out of me.
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Often it's early success at being able to forcibly control the mechanisms of love and respect that leads to an insensitive adult life. E.g. praising only academic success. Being good at a test or something measurable is linked to a shot of love & respect.
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It's only in an environment where love and respect were seen as infinite and unconditional that someone learns to produce it for themselves and others. Everyone else can only sell IOUs.
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