Calibration is easiest as a child but get much harder as you grow up. Many are "lost causes" where their consciousness become Gordian Knots that only release on death.
Ivory towers feel cold and snobbish and unplayful because they want an in-sync dance so much they put people through inhuman gauntlets, tests, and memorizing rules and moves that no one enjoys the dance anymore.
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They forget that a good dancer can dance with anything, especially the uglier parts of life. Creativity similarly is judged by how much you can do so little. They forget that the source of energy of life is the dance with the most ugliest things of all, Death/Truth/Nothingness.
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When you dance or connect with someone you're saying "I'm Ok", "You're Ok". That's the only way of dealing with the Not Okayness of the feeling of being Separate.
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