so my mom never let me have sleepovers at someone’s house unless it was at my house except this one girl who had a single mom that was friends with my mom so i didn’t think much of it
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i’ve had two or three sleepovers in my life and i was never allowed to go out more than a couple times a month growing up
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i wasn’t allowed to go to friends houses or anything and i hated my mom cuz my friends never invited me places cuz they knew i wouldn’t be allowed to go
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ages 15-17 i hated my mom cuz high school i wanted to be cool and hang with the fun cool crowd but my mom always said no. i felt that she fucked up my chances of being known in high school.
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we butt heads about going out ALL THE TIME and i lost my relationship with her. i barely wanted to talk to her or anything.
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after i got a black belt, graduated, got my license and a job, she let me have so much freedom and i became close to her. i loved her a lot again. don’t get me wrong, i never stopped but i felt i loved her more than ever
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we were on a trip in japan together when i just turned 20 and she revealed why she never let me go out
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she was given a ton of freedom growing up and she saw her female friends get molested by fathers and piano teachers etc. from young ages up till teens, she’s seen the damage it causes and how long the trauma remains.
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she thought that if she didn’t let me go out, i’d be protected from sexual abuse. and fuck yeah she was right!! i never had to worry about that sort of thing growing up. and by the time i knew what sexual abuse was, i knew how to protect myself and how to speak up
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at 18 i encountered my first sexual harasser but i had just received my black belt so i was able to protect myself. cried myself to sleep once but that was it. no trauma from that. shit was taken care of. i didn’t have any problem getting over it.
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i told my mom the encounter i had at 18 and how i handled it and how it didn’t effect me more than 1 night. she cried. she cried tears of relief. she told me how hard it was for her to sleep at night cuz she didn’t know if i was going through what her friends went through
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she was relieved that she did her job on protecting me from harm all throughout my childhood until adulthood. as women, it’s a normal thing for us to be preyed upon but growing up with my mom protecting me, i never had a clue. i had a happy childhood free from that trauma.
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my mom and i cried together for about an hour at a mall in japan. she is my best friend and my guardian angel. i’m blessed to have a woman like her protecting me. so before you go hating your mom, try remember that she could have a hidden reason behind her actions
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