Found out that members from my dad's side of the family basically went with the flow even thought they had imitations of other paths.
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Like my wife who self diagnosed a genetic disease root cause of a disparate set of symptoms (shes fucking badass) this feel like generational puzzle where the goal is to understand who I am and how I got this way through nature and nurture.
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"Nasty little Buddhist"
Seeking via neuroscience and psychology informed dharma.