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Hi. I’m a turnip. I have a higher IQ than the President.
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See, everyone! We can live together in peace.pic.twitter.com/3vDlBkrnK3
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Turnip Retweeted
GOP: Here's Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez in high school DANCING! She's so frivolous! GOP: Did you know that Beto O'Rourke was in a punk rock band?! Shocking! Dems: Brett Kavenaugh- GOP: That was a long time ago!
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A few weeks ago, I announced that “I am Q” as in a queer member of the LGBTQ+ community. I immediately began to lose followers. That was 2018. It’s 2019 now—are queer vegetables accepted yet?
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He recognizes me from Twitter. This is going to be a long flight.
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I’m on a plane right now and there’s an eggplant with a MAGA hat who’s really getting on my nerves.
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It’s called “America at its roots.”
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Turnip Retweeted
There is some idiot stamping this on five dollar bills, thinking the Lincoln Memorial is the White House.pic.twitter.com/trSjMoEkGx
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I’m tired and ready for it to be 2020. If you need me, I’ll be sitting motionless on this kitchen counter.
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I have a serious question: when Trump is tried, will he be tried as an adult?
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Turnip Retweeted
I hear the GOP thinks women dancing are scandalous. Wait till they find out Congresswomen dance too!
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Turnip Retweeted
run turnip run
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Others have pointed out a few accomplishments that I forgot: - - - -
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As we say goodbye to Paul Ryan, please join me in recognizing his career accomplishments: - - - - -
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The official theme song of my presidential campaign is...*drum roll*...
Turn the beet around
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I have a question, Twitter. Why does
@realdonaldtrump, who everyone hates, have 56.8 million followers while I, a turnip running for president against him, only have 113 thousand? Can we fix this?Thanks. Twitter will use this info to make your timeline better. UndoUndo -
Is it just me or has
@realDonaldTrump become an even bigger moron in 2019?Thanks. Twitter will use this info to make your timeline better. UndoUndo -
Turnip Retweeted
I heard Individual 1 is also going down this year
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It’s 2019 everybody! The year the Trump regime collapses!
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Why is it that Elizabeth Warren gets top press coverage for her presidential bid but I don’t even get a single article for mine? Does the media have something against root vegetables?
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